These insults are from a time before the English language got boiled down to four-letter words. These insults from famous people had style, imagination, and class. I only wish that I could burrow some to inflict on someone.

1. “I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; Bring a friend, if you have one.” –

George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.

“Cannot possibly attend [the] first night, I will attend the second…If there is one.” – Winston Churchill, in response.

2. A member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows, or of some unspeakable disease.”

“That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

3. “He had delusions of adequacy.” – Walter Kerr

4. “I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” – Clarence Darrow

5. “He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” – William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

6.”Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.” – Moses Hadas

7. “I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” – Mark Twain

8. “He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends..” – Oscar Wilde

9. “I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” – Stephen Bishop

10.”He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” – John Bright

11. “I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.”- Irvin S. Cobb

12. “He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.”- Samuel Johnson

13. “He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” – Paul Keating

14. “In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.”- Charles, Count Talleyrand

15. “He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.”- Forrest Tucker

16. “Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”- Mark Twain

17. “His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.”- Mae West

18. “Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”- Oscar Wilde

19. “He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… For support rather than illumination.”- Andrew Lang

20. “He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” – Billy Wilder

21. “I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” – Groucho Marx.

22.”He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” – Winston Churchill

Source: The English Community